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Joke of the Day

"The last US election had a candidate called Mitt, a devout Catholic and a candidate called Newt, a serial adulterer. One was against same sex marriage and the other was against same marriage sex."

"How many babies does it take to paint a wall?? Depends how hard you throw them."

"Sex burns 300 calories an hour. After doing some extensive calculations, this year I burned roughly 5 calories."

"There is no peer pressure like washing your hands because someone else walked into the bathroom."

"Did you hear about that new space mosque? It's Allah this world!"

"remember when everyone was worried we'd reached ""peak TV"" with too much to watch then it turned out we're a tragic nation of unending racism"

"Does any one need work. Working with tulips? Putting your tulips on these nuts."

"How do astronauts make a party? They planet."

"I just sprayed a mosquito with mosquito repellent. Now he'll never have any friends."

"How many Nazi skin heads does it take to screw in a light bulb? 10, 1 to do it and 9 to back him up. Source: https://redandblackbritain.wordpress.com/humour/"