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Joke of the Day

"I hate forensic TV shows like CSI. I know for a fact that they are completely unrealistic... I mean come on, women detectives?"

"People used to laugh at me when I said I wanted to become a comedian... well nobody's laughing now!"

"She said I have a face only a mother could love. I said ""that's not very nice, mom."""

"Why does the homeless man only drink coffee? He had no proper tea.."

"What kind of exercise does Ned Flanders like to do? Diddily-squats."

"What did the astrophysicist say to the quark? You matter."

"Were all addicted to something whats your addiction"

"I use bitcoin. That's my joke."

"Why did the twitter army lose all their battles? Because they kept retweeting."

"I've been single for a while now and I'm staring to realize something. They blur out A lot of Asian porn."