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Joke of the Day

"People who are mad that we don't have hoverboards yet are VERY forgiving of the fact that we still have, like, racism."

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"Why does my son deserve some Reddit Gold? Because he's Autistic."
"""Pikachu, use astonish!"" *Leans into opponent's ear* ""Jet fuel can't melt steel beams."""
"Whenever I weigh myself, I always subtract 10 pounds. I don't think boobs, brains, and an ass this fabulous should count against me."
"Where does a Turkey live? A coup."
"A blonde walks into a doctor's office and says, Doc, I'm horribly sick! The doctor looks at her and asks, flu? No, I drove here."
"Quickest way to offend a Jew you tell them Noweh!"
"I am really good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don't know y. Credit: Chris Turner"
"Why did the semen cross the road? I put the wrong socks on this morning..."
"I saw this really fit girl in the nightclub last night and she was wearing a chessboard patterned shirt..... So, I made a move on her."