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Joke of the Day

"Every woman wants to be swept off her feet. It's when you put her in the trunk of your car that she starts to panic."

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"[Black Humour] What u call a black woman with 7 abortions? Crimefighter"
"What do you get when you cross a judge and a potato? A Dicktater."
"Old witch: Now I know you want a job with me. Do you tell lies? Young witch: No but I can pick it up."
"Your mommas so fat That when she posted to /r/gonewild they renamed the sub /r/earthporn"
"I needed to clean my FleshLight, i heard they were dishwasher safe. But that would Just ruin the load."
"I have been reporting moms on Facebook who brag about how perfect their lives are as fake news."
"What do you call a ship that drives itself? Auto-pirate."
"i have a very frustrated pet at home... its a turtle that loves to chase cars"
"I have invented a machine *that reads the subtext in different voice*"