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Joke of the Day

"I've been fired for a childish behaviour Apparently, sucking tits of my female coworkers wasn't such a good idea."

"""It's five o'clock somewhere"" I say as I leave work at 9am"

"How does Jared like to play his flute? In A minor."

"Unless you're telling me how to skip it in the future, your voicemail greeting wastes my time."

"What do you call a cow that has abortion? Decaffeinated"

"Interrupting Cow Red: Knock Knock Dit: Who's There? Red: Interrupting Cow Dit: Interrupti- Red: MOOOOOOOOOOO"

"911: What's your emer- She said don't get her anything for Valentine's Day! 911: And you didn't? No! 911: Placing you in protective custody."

"[speaking very loudly to no one trying to impress someone nearby] Man what am I going to do with all these hens"

"Where do you see yourself in 10 years? In a mirror."

"Wanna read a really dirty joke? A white horse fell in the mud"