87157

Joke of the Day

"Froth too A guy saw an attractive Jamaican girl; he said...I love cappuccino... He was not attractive at all, so when she him, she was disgusted and spit at him. He said...oh wow with froth too. ."

"FOUR RULES FOR DATING MY TEENAGE DAUGHTER: 1) get her home by 11 p.m. 2) so we can chill 3) i have mario party 4) be my friend"

"I hope the meteorite crash in Russia doesn't affect the price of Vodka!"

"Jeffery Dahmer Did you know Jeffery Dahmer used to cut off his victims noses, put them on pizza and eat them? He called it Dahmer-nose pizza."

"I look at people sometimes and think..for real? That's the sperm that won?"

"Fucked this girl for an hour and 45 seconds a while ago. Thanks daylight savings"

"The thing about insomnia is 372 raised swirl patterns on the ceiling."

"On a scale from 1 - overweight black woman, how confident are you?"

"Why is there so little Puerto Rican literature? Because the spray paint can wasn't invented until 1949."

"The one time I actually wanted to use the word ""duck"" in a text... and my phone autocorrects it to ""fuck"". What the duck."