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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a thief that leaves a trail? A crummy thief!"
Next Joke
"If you think nobody cares whether you're alive... try missing a couple of payments."
"Have you seem the movie ""constipation""? Of course not, it hasn't come out yet! -Repost from r/funny-"
"I recently got a job in the fast food industry, changed my name to Fedora Everyone tips fedora!"
"Three eyes What do you call a pig with three eyes? A piiig What do you call a chimp with three eyes? A chiiimp What do you call a kid with three eyes? Chinese"
"What does the ISIS member say about telling good jokes? ""It's all in the execution."""
"You smell like trash..... Can I take you out?"
"Please ignore this status..... I am standing in public alone and I don't want to seem like a total loner, so I am making it look like I am texting."
"I just got a new dog that's half Saint Bernard and half Pitbull He likes to save people and then kill them."
"Patient: Doctor if I give up wine women and song will I live longer? Doctor: Not really. It will just seem longer."