106605

Joke of the Day

"Please ignore this status..... I am standing in public alone and I don't want to seem like a total loner, so I am making it look like I am texting."

"You can tell a lot about a person by what they swallow first when a cop pulls um over."

"Why didn't Harry Potter want to date Hermione? Because he likes to Hit it and Quidditch"

"What do sound engineers say when they leave? Audios"

"[jail] INMATE: so what are ya in for? BIG BAD WOLF: well I huffed and I puffed and then I got nabbed for possession INMATE: goddam pigs"

"What is a parrot's favorite game? Hide and Speak!"

"The Love for music! If someday we all go to prison for downloading music, I hope they split us by music genre."

"I can speak 10 languages. English and Binary"

"Why are farmers so wealthy? Because their stalks are always growing."

"A man came to my door and asked if I would make a donation to the local swimming pool. So I gave him a glass of water."