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Joke of the Day

"I wanted to major in marine biology but those guys get pretty upset when you follow them into the latrine with a tape measure."

Next Joke
 
"What does Monica Lewinsky and a soda machine have in common? They both say ""insert Bill here"""
"My therapist cries ""Why me?"" for the full hour."
"How do you know if your friend, ""Doesn't even OWN a TV?"" Because it's this answer to every question you ask them. ""Did you hear about the President's new policy on...?"" ""I don't even OWN a TV!"""
"nothing sexier than a Subway Sandwich Artist spreading tuna salad with an ice cream scoop"
"I like my coffee like I like my women Ground up and in the fridge."
"Yo momma so fat She got an event horizon."
"Why are Eastern-Europeans so racist on average? They're waiting for one more dictator to treat them like animals before confirming that racism sucks."
"So Porifera are hanging out in the ocean 680 million years ago.. ..when a Ctenophore swims by. One to the other asks, ""What just happened there?"" Buddy says ""Eumetazoa."""
"A local plastic surgeon started giving away free breast implants... They're up for grabs."
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