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Joke of the Day

"Why did the cookie get fired from his job? He came to work baked."

"What happens if you don't keep up payments to your exorcist? You get repossessed."

"What's the difference between a kitten and your wife? You actually want to cuddle a kitten after you fuck it."

"I'm not an alcoholic, alcoholics go to meetings. I'm a drunk, we go to parties."

"Six meaty inches of protein packed bliss! No joke, the actual description of the black forest ham sandwich from Subway for their October special."

"If you were playing a drinking game where you took a sip every time they said ""Lebron,"" you'd die."

"By putting the punchline in the title. How do you trick a bunch of Internet nerds into thinking you are a scumbag reposter?"

"Which 20th Century Business tycoon was a top? The one who could really Rock-a-feller"

"I keep getting the urge to purchase a big white bear from the artic... ...Doc says I might have ""Buy Polar"" disorder! EDIT: arctic*"

"Maybe it's just me, but I know a few people that Cupid should shoot with a gun."