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Joke of the Day

"Why did Microsoft skip straight to 10? Because Windows 7, 8, 9. I'll see myself out."

"Jesse Pinkman created an app that shows which coffee shops are serving Pumpkin Spice flavored beverages... He wrote it in BASIC, Bitch!"

"My friend David's ID was stolen the other day Now we just call him Dav"

"What is similar between a strip club and the Artic The poles are cold and then they are getting warmer."

"I saw a transvestite... wearing a T-shirt that said ""Guess"". Source: Demetri Martin. Person."

"The American education system obviously listen to Pink Floyd. They've left those kids a loan. EDIT: Woke up to find THIS :O"

"My Favorite Politician Quote (not sure if this belongs here but what the hell) ""Madam, I may be drunk but you're ugly, and in the morning I'll be sober."" - Winston Churchill"

"How Many Lightbulbs Does it Take to Change Captain Jean Luc Picard? 4 or 5."

"I just sold viagra to a guy who thinks it's adderal. He's going to have a very hard test tomorrow."

"Keep calm and pretend today isn't Monday."