79681

Joke of the Day

"How many therapists does it take to change a light bulb? One, but the light bulb has to want to change"

"Why are you stuffing all that Easter candy into your mouth?"" ""Because it doesn't taste as good if I stuff it in my ears."""

"As schoolgirl skirts get shorter... ...anemia rates grow in Japan."

"I hope zombies will come from Mexico. After eating their way through fat Americans, they'll be like ""Sorry little Canadians. We're full."""

"I choose what country to visit each year by the shape of the first chicken nugget I eat."

"All these mean jokes about the Boston Marathon Bombing ... are really crossing the line... too soon?"

"Downhill is probably the only way I can honestly say I've rolled."

"What have Disney and the U.K. got in common? Both dropped the EU And screwed over a lot of people"

"Tomorrow I am going to dig up and open the time capsule I buried when I was a kid. Cannot wait to see how big my puppy has gotten!"

"How do you pump a Republican for information? With a plunger."