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Joke of the Day

"[first date] Me: that is hilarious Date: ... Me: wait, bread or dead? Date: how would my parents be bread?"

"From my 6yo Me (after having taught her subtraction): ""So, what's the difference between 10 and 5?"" ""They're just two different numbers!"""

"Why are furries always found guilty at trial? A furry curries only fury from a jury."

"They say that if you are bad in this life, you re-encarnate into a 'Nickelback' song in the next one."

"Millions of Thanksgiving turkeys recalled. It seems that someone forgot to butter their balls before they left the factory."

"What times does the chinaman go to the dentist? Tooth-hurty"

"What do you call a comedian who couldn't make it? Pun intended."

"""This is not a drill!"" ~Guy holding a hammer."

"How did Tom Brady's feel after losing to the Broncos? Deflated"

"Did you hear about the man who died of a viagra overdose? They couldn't close his coffin."