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Joke of the Day

"What times does the chinaman go to the dentist? Tooth-hurty"

"What is 90-60-90? Speed while driving past a speed camera."

"What's the difference between a cat and a comma? One has claws at the end of its paws and one is a pause at the end of a clause"

"Don't you just hate it when you BP red wine on a white tablecloth? [New verb. Make it so.]"

"I'm a good driver until there is a cop behind me Then I become a paranoid weed transporter from the border"

"My mom's favorite Easter joke: Why does the Easter bunny hide Easter eggs? Because he doesn't want anyone to know he's fucking a chicken."

"your mama so fat that when she wanted a water bed they had to put a cover over the Atlantica Ocean."

"""This is NPR."" Yeah, we know. You just spent the past 4 minutes whispering the news over a jazz saxophone solo."

"[Mr. Robot] I may be late... ...and, for sure, Edward Alderson is late, but Christian's later"

"The Jerk Store called... and they're running out of you! (thought about this joke all day)"