73420

Joke of the Day

"How do you get a hipster to take a shower? Give them a leaky showerhead. You know, so they can avoid the main stream."

Next Joke
 
"Guy asked me where I got my green eyes. Great! Now I have to explain what the Vikings did when they got to Sicily."
"Q: What do you get when you cross a caterpillar and a parrot? A: A walkie-talkie."
"Why do feminist picnics suck? Because no one ever makes sandwiches."
"What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer. What do you call a deer with no eyes or legs? Still no eye deer. What do you call a deer with no eyes, legs, or genitalia? Still no fucking eye deer."
"What do you call the Lord Commander of the Night's Watch voting? Counting Crows"
"[boss calls me to office] We found a lot of disgusting porn on your computer. Thats a matter of opinion. Some may say it's the right amount."
"What is white on top and black on the bottom? Society"
"I'm unsure how I feel about my new mirror... ...I just haven't had time to reflect yet. www.ChippedBeefOnToast.com"
"That moment when you check the price tag and sadly walk away."