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Joke of the Day

"I'm unsure how I feel about my new mirror... ...I just haven't had time to reflect yet. www.ChippedBeefOnToast.com"

"I'm a Gentleman. I'll always give a woman my umbrella if it's raining outside. Unless she's wearing white of course."

"Dad cooks a deer for dinner... And doesn't tell the kids what it is. He gives one clue ""it's what your mother calls me"". The little boy yells ""it's a fucking dick, DONT EAT IT!!"""

"Why is Six afraid of Seven Because Seven is a Six offender."

"My teacher asked me if I knew any anagrams of ""denied"". I said, ""Indeed""."

"What do you call a sad Ent? Mourning wood."

"Bought shoes from a drug dealer Not sure what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day!"

"don't hate robert altman's 1992 satirical comedy ""the player"" hate david fincher's 1997 psychological thriller ""the game"""

"I wouldn't say I do a lot of psychedelics... But my couch has seatbelts."

"I'm gonna steal a bunch of Jesus fish off minivans and then put them back three days later."