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Joke of the Day

"Why do feminist picnics suck? Because no one ever makes sandwiches."

"I bought a thesaurus at a store today. Brought it home to find all the pages were blank... I have no words to describe how angry I am"

"Do you know the 20th President of the United States ? No we were never introduced !"

"What's the difference between a tire and 365 condoms? One's a Goodyear, and the other's a great year. x/post from r/funny"

"What is Green, Slimy, and smells like Bacon? Kermit's finger."

"Vegetables They never knew what hit em"

"Ebo said ....said that Africa didn't have an awful disease. EBO lie"

"Patient: Doctor! Doctor! My mouth tastes like the bottom of a birdcage! Dentist: Yes, I can see there's been a cockatoo in there."

"My girlfriend always likes to pretend to be 14 when we have sex... I don't know why, she'll be 14 in a couple years anyway."

"What's the difference between a rectal thermometer and an oral thermometer? The taste!"