715

Joke of the Day

"Get a big metal box, label it ""TIME CAPSULE"" and take a big dump in it so people know what 2011 was like."

"When pigs have a party who jumps out of the cake? Nobody. The pigs all jump in."

"If you are ever cold. If you are ever cold, go to a corner. It's usually 90 degrees."

"I used to have S.I.D.S now I have PTSD :("

"I just made up a new word Plagiarism."

"If two vegetarians get into a fight Is it still considered beef?"

"*pops the hood* ""Looks like the timing nut is gone on yer muffler belt"" .. Umm r u sure you work here? *lifts eye brow, moustache falls off*"

"What do you call an owl who does magic? WHO-DINI"

"Why did the tree look pissed off all the time? It had Resting Birch Face."

"Why did Sepp Blatter resign from the FIFA president position? He just couldn't hold it any longer."