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Joke of the Day
"When pigs have a party who jumps out of the cake? Nobody. The pigs all jump in."
Next Joke
"Cop: Admit it! You killed that family Murderer: You can't prove anything... Cop: You know, you're actually called ""Murderer"" in this thing"
"I punched a drug addict in the face. I guess I beat the crack outta him. (The best joke I have ever made up.)"
"Still haven't mastered the art of gracefully taking off a sweatshirt."
"I went to see an inflatable marching band I was excited at first, but when I got there they turned out to be pretty flat...."
"What was the code to hitler's secret bunker? NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN NEIN!"
"What do you get when you hire an owl to babysit your kids? A real hootenanny!"
"Confucius on Sex Confucius say, ""It is good for boy to meet girl in park...but it is better for boy to park meat in girl."""
"OBAMA: your resume says you think of the ""best nicknames?"" ME: that's right, Obama-nable snowman *finger guns* OBAMA: [softly] holy shit"
"Why are British anti-smoking PSA's often made by homophobes? Because they want to prevent people from bumming fags"