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Joke of the Day

"""It seems like many polls are turning against you. How do you respond?"" TRUMP: They should be sent back to Poland. Very dangerous people."

"Can I borrow your G-String? Mine broke... said one guitarist to the other"

"Don't take me camping because if I see a bear, I will hug that bear."

"This guy just climbed through a thicket of waist-high shrubbery to avoid walking past me. That's the kind of anti-social I aspire to be."

"Her: I love that thing you do to make me moan. Me: *makes another plate of nachos*"

"Ya know, I've never taken an ugly girl to bed... Woke up with a few though."

"Why was the hen banned from sending e-mails? She was always using fowl language."

"The Miss Universe pageant is fixed. All the winners are from Earth."

"2016: Surely Donald Trump won't win 2017: He can't do that... right? 2018: I hope my district wins the Hunger Games!"

"Did you hear the joke about the dance? The punchline wasn't funny."