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Joke of the Day

"How many sound guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, two... One, two."

"In the movie 'The Hunt for Red October' ... the entire story is the sub-plot."

"How do you get to a position of power in a science lab? Work over time"

"why was 6 afraid of 7 because 789"

"I was going to say a gay joke... butt fuck it."

"I've got 99 problems but my battery is almost dead so I guess we'll have to talk about this later."

"[wife enters as I'm doing the worm] Wife: WTH are you doing? Me: It's not what it looks like. Worm: Who the hell is she?!"

"If a child refuses to sleep during nap time... are they guilty of resisting a rest?"

"The Seattle Seahawks play calling."

"The best part about being a grown-up is not having to answer to ANYONE! (What's that, honey? Be right there.)"