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Joke of the Day

"Read an article that said Google is making us dumber. whatever, I've always used Google and I'm super [googles synonym for smart] able."

"What did the statue say to the chair? Chair? Statue?! :D"

"OP worked at a pizza restaurant OP delivered ^^^^^^pizza"

"Don't be scared of the government shutdown, liquor stores are run by the states."

"How do you know if a girl is ticklish? Give her two test tickles."

"Why do elephants and stoners get along so well? ....uh.. I don't remember.."

"How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same, but the dishes pile up."

"What's the difference between a gambler and a Kasich supporter? A gambler might lose."

"Quit my job at the helium factory today I refuse to be spoken to in that tone"

"I think my cat is a communist. He keeps saying ""Mao"""