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Joke of the Day

"Where do Eggs keep their holidays pictures? In a photo albumen..."

"Your mom's so old, she's probably going to die soon."

"I might have Alzheimer's... ...but at least I don't have Alzheimer's."

"Hoot: How the hell can ya be so stupid? Jessie: Well it ain't somethin' yew can pick up overnight."

"Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times, you're good. Fool me four times, WOW! Did you major in fooling?"

"The first rule of winter sex The one who has a running nose has to be under the other."

"Time to buy a new car, a bigger TV, a better cell phone and a faster laptop so I'll finally be happy! (Repeat over and over until you die)"

"Life Goals Me at 14 - get a girl to like me, figure out how to have sex Me at 34 - get a girl to like me, figure out how to have sex"

"Two blondes are standing in opposite sides of the river. One yells: - HOW DO I GET TO THE OTHER SHORE?! The other answers: - YOU ARE IN THE OTHER SHORE!"

"[NSFW] Warning Explicit Content This form is explicit. y=x^2"