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Joke of the Day

"Life Goals Me at 14 - get a girl to like me, figure out how to have sex Me at 34 - get a girl to like me, figure out how to have sex"

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"What do xbox services and prostitutes have in common? They both take my money then go down on me"
"People who comment with 'goose bums' on YouTube videos, more power to you!"
"Red-nosed Rudolph was hit by a 747 and a flock of seagulls on Christmas Eve during a gift delivery over Barcelona The reindeer in Spain was hit mainly by the plane (Courtesy of Colin Mochrie)"
"What did the college junior say just before her toe was cut off? NO PLEASE DON'T CUT OFF MY TOE!"
"Why did the trekkie spit out her latte at the Star Trek Convention? Cause William Shatner Coffee. hahahha"
"Q: How many 'Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb? A: None: A 'Real Woman' would have plenty of Real Men around to do it."
"I deal with my personal problems the same way i study for tests, I don't I deal with my personal problems the same way i study for tests, I don't"
"What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you Pull the pin out and throw it back"
"Life hack: Stare into your Uber driver's eyes through the rear view mirror the entire time."