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Joke of the Day

"Where do astronauts leave their spacecraft? At parking meteors."

"What do you call a white guy with 2 black guys in the back of the car? The police. What do you call a black guy with 2 white guys in the back of the car? Uber!"

"Tombstone request: Born a virgin, lived a virgin, died a virgin. The engraver shortened it to: "" Returned unopened."""

"How did the prostitute get a job at the zoo? They heard she could handle a cockatoo."

"I'm starting a Mexican hate group. It's called the quequeque."

"How do cows measure time? In mooments"

"I saw a homeless man holding a sign. It said, ""2 will change my life."" Unfortunately, I only had a 5 note in my pocket."

"I finally figured out the secret to click bait."

"Kid just asked ""why is it called 'flipping the bird'? Why not turtle? Flipping the Turtle."" I can't even answer that bc WHY NOT TURTLE?!"

"My brother thought it'd be hilarious to replace all my Adderall with Viagra... which explains how I've been studying so hard."