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Joke of the Day
"Choosing between Trader Joe's and Whole Foods is white people's real Twilight."
Next Joke
"My grandad gave me some sound advise on his deathbed. ""It's worth spending money on good speakers"", he told me."
"Let's play ""Is it an adjective or a verb?"" I love fucking pickles!"
"What's it called when the bottom half of a fraction has loads of cake in it? A denom-nom-nominator!"
"""Daddy, am I going to die someday?"" ""No, you're the only immortal being in the entire world. Goodnight, stupid."""
"Why did Harry Potter's friends pick him up and pass him around on his birthday? They were playing pass the Parseltongue."
"So my cousin has bieber fever... Or as it's medically known, Down Syndrome."
"I broke my finger last week On the other hand, i'm ok"
"nudist camp for intellectuals 2 people at a nudist camp for intellectuals, one says to the other ""have you read Marx?"" The 2nd say ""yes, because of these wicker chairs"""
"Someone please recommend a self-help book that can teach me how to sleep through an alarm."