44284

Joke of the Day

"My wife told me to find someone else if anything ever happened to her so I don't know why she got pissed when she found my ""prospects"" list."

"Why was oedipus against profanity Because he kisses his mother with that mouth"

"What is the difference between batman and a black guy? Batman can walk into a store without Robin"

"My teacher told me that two words should never have the same sound. What a homophonic bigot!"

"what do you call an alligator in a vest? An Investigator"

"Can Walmart be a feeling? I think that's how I feel today."

"What did the father lightning bolt do to his son when he miabehaved? He grounded him."

"I didn't realize how many of the songs on my iPod are about sex and drugs until I hit ""shuffle"" in a car with a 12-year-old in it."

"ME: Do ghosts wear condoms DENTIST: How are you still awake"

"Having kids isn't that bad, just don't have like the really young ones."