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Joke of the Day

"What did the father lightning bolt do to his son when he miabehaved? He grounded him."

"I'm selling my Theremin.... I haven't touched it in years."

"How do you know the toothbrush was invented in the South? Because if it were invented in the North, it'd be called the teethbrush!"

"Why do pigs have flat snouts? From running in to trees."

"A motorist ran into a shop. ""Do you own a black and white cat?"" he asked. ""No"" replied the manager. ""Oh dear"" said the motorist ""I must have run over a nun."""

"What does a Texan do if he breaks up with his girl friend? He dates his other sister."

"I came across 3 snakes while mowing the yard today, but those of you in North America already know that because you heard me scream"

"I made a knock-knock joke for ya Me: knock-knock You: Who's there? Me: DEAD NAZI! You:... Dead nazi who? Me: I bet you Dead Nazi that one coming."

"Psychic said I should learn to take criticism better & always consider both sides of an issue, so I gave her the back of my palm to read."

"Told my GF: ""We haven't had sex for almost a month."" She replied: ""Speak for yourself."""