42019

Joke of the Day

"I just gave my kid ice cream because she wouldn't stop crying. Sorry, whoever she winds up marrying."

"What's the cheesiest Stallone film? Roquefort."

"What did the vegan give the homeless guy? A lecture."

"Why are normal human body temperatures around 98.7*F? Because we're all a little obtuse."

"My comedian alias would be The Carcinogin My jokes give people cancer"

"English teachers' favorite knock-knock joke Knock-knock Who's there? To To who? *To whom*"

"What do you call a hockey line with Connor McDavid, Taylor Hall, and Nail Yakupov? The Lottery Line"

"What did the vegan Neanderthal say when walking in to the woman's bathroom? Chickpea"

"What is a stalkers favorite part of a hospital? the I see you."

"What does a fastidious female call a condom? Goo-be-gone"