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Joke of the Day

"What's the cheesiest Stallone film? Roquefort."

"Women call me ugly until they hear how much money I make. Then they call me ugly *and* poor."

"I had some Taco Bell the other night. Shit was spewing out of my ass at 88mph. Now everyone at school calls me Doc Brown."

"What does a baby computer call its father? Da-ta"

"You know you're clumsy when you drop a stick playing air drums."

"How to pick up a girl Me: Are you interested in having the best sex of your life? Her: No. Me: Well then you came to the right place ;)"

"When my girlfriend said she was leaving because of my obsession with The Monkees, I thought she was joking. And then I saw her face."

"I got my car towed by a celebrity yesterday. I don't even have THAT big of a car."

"When I die I hope someone puts ""In Memory Of Jenny Johnson"" in old English lettering across the back windshield of their Buick Riviera."

"What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese."