41998

Joke of the Day

"Sex is like art. Most of it is pretty bad, and the good stuff is out of your price range."

"Stop. Stop it right now. I'm going to count to five. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. ~A parenting haiku."

"Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis."

"What did the Dalai Llama play on stage at Glastonbury? Yakmanninov"

"I delete enough tweets to know I should never get a tattoo."

"How to bring pacman to life Scratch your head and think of the Wakas. Soon you'll see pacman while brushing your teeth."

"What's the secret ingredient in Bush's Baked Beams? Jetfuel."

"DAE keeps struggling with fitting their shopping cart into a row of parked shopping carts? Apparently you first have to remove your daughter."

"Are you today's date? because you're an 11/10 (:"

"Why is French body armour so cheap? They only need it for their back"