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Joke of the Day

"A Horse goes into a bar and says Nothing. Because a horse cant speak."

"The best cure for dry coughing. Take some laxative. You will not cough, trust me."

"what is the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? beer nuts are at least a dollar fifty, and deer nuts are just under a buck."

"Women know that men are like linoleum . . . If they lay 'em right the first time, they can walk on them for years."

"If god can artificially inseminate someone, why did he need two of every animal on the ark to repopulate the world?"

"How do you tell the difference between a computer scientist and an aspiring music artist? Ask them what 'unsigned' means."

"Whats a rapists perfect date? Netflix and kill."

"What did the sea say to the river? You can run but you can't tide!"

"Alarming new research into the growing sleep epidemic Over 99% of people are now addicted to sleep, admitting they engage in sleep at least twice a week, most say they couldn't live without it"

"If you ask me to go get ""Eyetalian"" food with you, our friendship is probably over."