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Joke of the Day

"FYI: If someone says ""I'm game,"" you can legally shoot them. You should probably check your state and local hunting regulations though."

"The Government"

"Weed is not a drug, its a plant. Therefore, I'm not a drug dealer, I'm a florist."

"Maybe we should put Obama on the $20 bill Then we would finally get the change he promised."

"I tried to watch the paralympic games.. I couldn't though because the channel was disabled"

"What happened when Dumbo went to a mindrreader? They gave him his money back."

"""Age is just a number"" ...so is your credit score, your weight, the balance in your bank account"

"What do you call a dog that is a magician? A Labara Cadabarador"

"Where do burgers go when they die? Burgatory"

"Sometimes I find it hard to express myself because FedEx hears me breathing."