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Joke of the Day

"I've come to the realisation that tofu is over rated- It's just a curd to me."

"Just bit into a Pop Tart so hot that it caused me to involuntarily perform the falsetto ""ah-ha-ha-ha-"" intro to Stayin' Alive"

"She told me to go deeper.... But I was all out of poems."

"If you clone a twin... Do you get triplets?"

"I'm coming down the home stretch of the semester... its getting tough, my work is starting to pile up faster then the rape allegations against Bill Cosmy"

"I received this computer for Christmas yesterday. I'm already ashamed of the things it has seen."

"When it comes to friends...I'd rather have four quarters than one hundred pennies."

"How do you get a fat girl into bed with you? A piece of cake"

"A vegan, a feminist, and a Stranger Things fan walk into a bar... I only know because they told everyone within two minutes..."

"Why was Hitler better than Jesus (offensive)? Belated Hitler birthday joke! Jesus may have fed 5,000 people with a few loaves of bread and fish, but Hitler made 6 million Jews toast."