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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend said she doesn't mind what car she gets, as long as it gets her from A to B. Which I fully support. Her boobs are far too small."

Next Joke
 
"How do you find out that a blonde girl got a bad day? She has a tampon behind her ear, and she is looking for her pencil."
"What does suicide and marriage have in common? (This one needs work...) Permanent solution to temporary problem."
"What do you call an epileptic leper taking a bath? Porridge."
"Did you hear the joke about ebola? ...you won't get it."
"Pardon my french, other day a redditor corrected me and told me Snickering and Sniggering are almost the same word and mean near the same thing. so Knickers and... sneakers are the same also?"
"Waiter: Can I get you something to drink? Me: just cheese dip Waiter: .... Me: With a straw please"
"I like my sex the way I like my tweets. Forced and meaningless."
"What do you call paying for services with a blowjob? A package deal."
"Ms Piggy... http://imgur.com/BtVKY"