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Joke of the Day

"What do you call it when a signal processing firm quickly remodels their entryway? A fast foyer transform!"

"What is it called when the gynecologist slanders your grandfather? A pap smear."

"Him:Dude, I went on one of those police ride alongs with my friend..it was awesome! You ever done that? Me: In the front or back of the car?"

"I'm on the snake diet. It's the one where you lie on the floor all day, eat 25% of your body weight, and hiss at anyone who comes near you."

"Crabs A man goes to a $10 hooker and contracts crabs. When he goes back to complain, the hooker laughs and says, ""What do you expect for $10 -- lobster?"""

"[NSFW] A guy to a girl - Hey, want to stick our fingers in each other's belly-botton ? Girl - Sure, how do W... OH, thats not my belly button. Guy - That's not my finger!"

"If you're feeling down about yourself, it won't help you to know that Honey Boo Boo makes more money than school teachers."

"Did you hear about the group of Warriors eating Caviar? They Choked"

"So, when does this adulthood thing start then?"

"Bathroom Break A client told me she had to cut our meeting short to go to the bathroom.... she was full of shit."