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Joke of the Day

"Why couldnt the laptop see? Cause it was SoDIMM"

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"The other day I saw a guy with sin/cos on his arm... ... He had a really nice tan"
"Alcohol won't mend a broken heart.But that doesn't mean I won't try it again tonight."
"Ever had sex while camping? It's fucking intense."
"I want to piss on the guy that stole my tweet, changed it slightly and submitted as his own on FunTweets and then set him on fire."
"Doctor, doctor I broke my arm in two places. Doctor: Stop going to those places."
"So apparently RSVP'ing back to a wedding invite 'maybe next time' isn't the correct response"
"Why are Omegle and Chatroulette great dating sites? Because they have plenty of members."
"You have to love a boss with a sense of humor. Mine just sent me a 7am meeting notice on Outlook and I've never laughed so hard..."
"I'm writing a song about milking a cow. It's all quarter notes."