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Joke of the Day
"Why was Helen Keller such a terrible driver? Because she was a woman."
Next Joke
"""chill before serving"" is the best advice I can think of if you're an angry waitress"
"Donald Trump's Vice President... ...Charlie Sheen, cause they will be Winning!"
"My parents used to listen to jimmy saville back in the seventies If only they had come into my room and stopped him."
"My friend and I wanted to take the spider out instead of killing it... Went and got drinks, cool guy, wants to be a web designer."
"Why did the cows return to the marijuana field? It was the pot calling the cattle back."
"If you're going to throw someone under the bus, make sure it's moving."
"A couple of biologists had twins. One they called John and the other control."
"Honey, let's make this cactUS a cacti. What I'm saying is I want a divorce, and I'm taking the cactus with me."
"When I play poker, it turns out a lot like when I poop when there's no toilet paper... I get shit hands"