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Joke of the Day

"[Nerd Joke] Yo momma's so fat she sees red lights as green... ...Doctors call this colour blindness, physicists call it gravitational blue-shift."

"How to make your wife take care while driving? Tell her that if she meets with a serious accident, the newspaper will have to print her age."

"My girlfriend treats me like I'm God She ignores my existence and doesn't ever speak to me."

"I wanna make a joke about sodium. But Na."

"Eating chocolate pudding from a diaper is a good way to get a whole row to yourself at the cinema."

"""What do we want?"" ""Yesterday!"" ""When do we want it?"" ""NOW!"" ~ Conservatives"

"I won't be getting any sex tonight but I beat level 15 on Bejeweled so its pretty much just as good."

"Don't you hate it when your girlfriend yells out a different name during sex Like bitch, my name isn't ""someone help"""

"Im sorry I yelled ""GARY LIKED STAR WARS EPISODE ONE"" when the pastor asked if anyone knew of a reason why you and Gary shouldn't be married"

"You're never too old to learn something stupid."