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Joke of the Day
"As an ass assessor, I assess asses."
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"*puts on white shirt* *accidentally spills coffee* *takes off shirt* *shoves shirt into coffee pot* *puts on brown shirt*"
"What's your favorite ""I just hurt myself or messed up"" phrase? Like, oh fuck! Oh shit! TITTY SPRINKLESSSSSSS"
"I thought I would have to kill my bitch of a wife, but then she suffocated on saran wrap. I was so Glad."
"British jokes aren't funny anymore. They lack hEUmour."
"I have a joke about this site... never mind you probably reddit"
"Why are there so many dogs at the pound? Because no one wants them."
"Do Apes kiss? Yes but never on the first date!"
"If you get your phone wet, put it in a bag of rice overnight Eventually an Asian will come and fix it"
"Why can't blondes finish software updates? They can never find the ""any"" key."