221984

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between an Atheist and a black guy? Atheists are stereotyped as being giant dicks. Black guys are stereotyped as having giant dicks."

"2. So I said to the shoe salesman... - I'm looking for a pair of basketball shoes... Shoe salesman - ajkdkdkaldnrmsldkd - what? Shoe salesman - sorry, I was struggling to converse."

"Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?"

"I just think there are a lot more animals out there we could be eating."

"Why can't you keep a secret from cattle? They herd"

"My friend asked me if I ever missed the idea of being in the womb. I said ""The only thing I'd miss was my umbilical cord....."" I was very attached to it."

"ME: hey baby HOT GIRL: ME: HOT GIRL: ME: HOT GIRL: ME: *looks closer* HOT GRILL: ME: oh"

"So Jesus... Walks in to a hotel, with a hand full of nails and a hammer in the other...and asks ""Can you put me up for the night ?"""

"I hope fashion in the future isn't all like, weird metal bird outfits. Cuz a bunch of mine just got stolen."

"There are three types of people in the world Those who can count, and those who can't"