221682

Joke of the Day

"If I am ever on life support, unplug me ... ... then plug me back in. See if that works."

"Which Lord Mayor of London was always on the Internet? Click Whittington"

"Why does Bernie always hold the podium while giving a speech? It's tough to stand on your own when you have no spine."

"The Suicide Hotline is Unbearable They always leave people hanging."

"What's the difference between an outlaw and an in- law? Outlaws are wanted."

"Why would somebody punch a sheep? Ewe wouldn't understand."

"There are three rings in marriage The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering."

"My uncle always believed that ""Between duct tape and WD-40 you can fix just about anything."" I still can't believe it took seven years before he lost his medical license."

"Using a butter knife on steak... it just doesn't cut it."

"There's no reason to be tailgating me when I'm doing 50 in a 35. And those flashing lights on top of your car looks ridiculous!"