220831

Joke of the Day

"I think Ronda Rousey would be at a disadvantage if she fought Floyd Mayweather. Mayweather has had practice beating women"

"[2 months into relationship] HER: you've changed ME: [proudly] showered, too"

"What did the monkey say when he was on a winning streak? I've banana roll lately."

"Doctor told me I will die soon. Bastard found out I was banging his wife."

"Pool donations A man came to my door Asking for donations towards the local swimming pool So I peed in it."

"My friend did some graffiti with me He just tagged along."

"You know, I always really liked Meatloaf I've never had any beef with him"

"Didn't have internet on my phone for the past few hours. Finally graduated, got married, lost some weight, read 15 books and showered."

"What is AdBlock?"

"We need to make music cool again people. If you go home with someone and they have a Justin Bieber CD in their music collection, don't fcuk them."