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Joke of the Day

"Out for the Count by Esau Stars"

"What's the definition of a will? It's a dead giveaway!"

"What does a pedophile and a turtle have in common? They both wanna get there before the hare does."

"Yes, autocorrect, I wanted to ask if she was all tight. Thank you. Now I know."

"Why did the pregnant woman love to tell jokes? Because she had a pun in the oven!"

" ! #16 UgarUp 2015 2015 ..."

"I just flew in from Cleveland And boy are my arms tired."

"Guys, I ran the numbers, and each 1000 Twitter followers adds about as much actual value and happiness to your life as a taco."

"Beer before liquor, never been sicker. Liquor before social interactions, very helpful."

"Doc, I can't stop singing... ""Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'."" He said: ""That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome."" ""Is it common?"" I asked. He replied, ""It's not unusual."""