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Joke of the Day

"What do a nearsighted gynecologist and a dog have in common? A wet nose."

"Y'know, a lot of conflict in the Wild West could have been avoided with a little foresight by the city planners. All they had to do was make that town big enough for the two of them."

"Did you hear about the man who got a hatchet stuck in his teeth? It was accidental."

"I can tell within seconds of meeting someone if they'd be annoying on a group email."

"Reddit is like a shiny new penny It's fun to look at but completely worthless :P"

"I'll be signing books at the library tomorrow from 2-4pm (or until that librarian calls the cops again). Come on out!"

"What does the twitter bird do when it needs money? It goes to Twerk!"

"What's the difference between jam and marmalade? (NSFW) You can't marmalade your dick into your girlfriends ass"

"Q: What were the unauthorized protestors guilty of doing? A: Marching banned."

"Dating tip: if you want a girl to hold you tight, start pushing her off a cliff."