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Joke of the Day

"Knock knock (....) Interrupting journalist (.. Bang Bang.... bang!"

"Decades have gone by and STILL my parents have not given back the Halloween candy they took from me ""for safe keeping""."

"In 1979, a call coming from inside the house was a reason for terror. In 2014, it means one of you is too lazy to shout or come downstairs."

"My girlfriend thinks my jokes are stupid, but she still wants to have sex with me. So, who's stupid now?"

"Gay jokes aren't funny Cum on guys..."

"Policeman: Why did you crash into that stop sign? Motorist: I was only following orders."

"Some people dream of success, others are awake & work hard at it."

"cop pulls me over 2nite. comes 2 my window n asks, Cop: ""do you know y i pulled u over?"" Me: ""because Batman is catching all the criminals"""

"How do you turn soup to gold? Add 24 carrots"

"A rough, hard drinking baseball umpire was upset because he couldn't get his little boy to sit on his lap and talk to him. After all, the son never sits on the brutish umpire."