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Joke of the Day

"I can tell everything I need to know about a person by how they cut their sandwich. Diagonal = normal Straight = serial killer No cut = dad"

"My girlfriend is a pornstar Shes going to kill me once she finds out,"

"A Canadian walks into a bar has a drink, pays his tab, and leaves."

"When a soldier goes sentimental, his favorite band will be Guns'N'Roses."

"a cannibal's favorite drink What drink does a cannibal have after a long day? a handshake!"

"Why was Edward stuck at the Russian airport? Because he was Snowden."

"My mum says I don't know anything about colourless gases. But ammonia little boy."

"Gay jokes are not funny Cum on guys"

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water. I don't know what they did up there, but they came back with a daughter."

"Who let the dogs out? Chuck Norris let the dogs out...... and then roundhouse kicked them through an Oldsmobile."