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Joke of the Day

"I hate people who knock on my door and tell me that I need to be saved or I'm going to burn. Stupid firemen."

Next Joke
 
"Woke up this morning, looked in the mirror & said out loud, ""You gotta bring it today!"" SO I'M GONNA BRING IT! *brings lunch to work*"
"Q: What did the tire say to the tire? A: I'm tired!"
"What do feminists and Sports Authority have in common? They've got a rivalry with Dicks"
"Everything is rightly confused."
"How does Moses make coffee? Hebrews it :)"
"What is the Jolly Green Giant most afraid of? Avocado pickers"
"I hate toilet seats... They're all assholes."
"What does a pirate call his idiot son? A retarrrrrd"
"She's like a cat. I don't mean in bed, she just ignores me"