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Joke of the Day

"A child is being pushed around in a pink toy convertible while eating a chocolate frosted donut, and I want to ask her how she got this job."

"If Joan Rivers rises from the ashes.... Will she be Rivers Phoenix?"

"One advantage of being a woman is no one can surprise you with a kid years later and tell you you're the mom."

"I have a cast iron fetish I guess you could say I'm pansexual"

"Why is the ulna the second funniest bone in our skeleton? It's near-humerus."

"A man goes to the zoo and the only animal in the zoo is a dog. It was a shih tzu."

"There are few things I enjoy more than picking an argument with my girlfriend when she has the hiccups."

"What did the koala bear say to the barber? You ca-lip this?"

"I bet hell is full of morning people and obsessive compulsive facebook pokers."

"What do you get when you pour boiling hot water down a rabbit hole at Easter? Hot Cross Bunnies!"