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Joke of the Day
"I saw a man drinking brake fluid. But then he stopped."
Next Joke
"How do you know that a dog is a man's best friend? Take your girl and your dog, and lock them in the back of a car, return in 5 hours, which one do you think will be happy to see you?"
"What do you say when somebody calls you a pussy? "" You are what you eat! """
"We don't talk about the Duggar family in our house anymore. The subject is a bit too touchy."
"Shit happens. Just flush the toilet and move on."
"When I get a dog, I am going to name him Franz Ferdinand So I can take him out (I tried)"
"A guy came to me at the bar the other day and said ""Hey bartender, I don't have much money so give me a cheap shot!"" . . I told him ""your mom is ugly and your breathe stinks"""
"If four out of five people suffer from radiation poisoning... Does that mean the fifth one enjoys it?"
"Why didn't the Irishman add another bean? He stopped at 239 because if he added another one it would be 'too farty'. It would've been funnier if I could do an Irish accent."
"Are you today's date? because you're an 11/10 (:"